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Anita Done

Appointed in May of 2009 as white house communications director, Anita Dunn today announced her acceptance of an offer by Kim Jong Il to assume the position of “under secretary for political communications” in the Democratic Peoples Republic of Korea. Dunn acknowledged the apparent suddenness of her decision by offering a quote by chairman Mao, “Genuine equality between the sexes can only be realized in the process of the socialist transformation of society as a whole.” The group of reporters present for the announcement nodded their heads as they pretended to understand what she was talking about. Dunn, the veteran political operative, stressed that her move is not the result of ideological differences with the current US administration. “For me, this is clearly a decision taken with the best wishes of my former employer who, at the end of the day, understands and completely supports the struggles of the world’s oppressed masses.” Dunn’s husband, Robert Bauer, says he will enjoy the relaxing shift toward a socially just and fair agrarian lifestyle, adding that ugliness on the part of North Korean rice farmers is simply a common  example of the  kind of malicious right wing extremism normally associated with starvation. During the interview,  Robert Gibbs was seen making multiple trips to the mens’ room murmuring,  “… Rahm said, she’s got to go!…Rahm said!…must control stupid!…no stupid!…Rahm said!”

Anita Dunn

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